Friday, June 27, 2008


I've seen the movie "The Birds" twice. While I appreciate Hitchcock's contribution to cinematic history and have enjoyed some of his other films, this one really didn't do it for me. It might have been the people I watched it with or something, I don't know. But I think if I were to see it again now, I would have a much better appreciation for it. Why? Because now I've lived it.

For the past 2 weeks every day after work, and sometimes at lunch too, when I have walked out of the parking garage at my office this little blackbird has swooped down towards me and continued to fly near me until I reach my car. Each day he has gotten a little closer.

Two days ago I was on guard, looking for him as I careful walked out. At first I didn't see him. Then I turned my head to see his sharp beak coming at full speed straight for my face. I turned and ducked quick enough to feel his wings brush against my head.

Like the silly characters in the movie, I tried to think that there was nothing to it. I was overreacting and anyway it was just one bird that was acting crazy.

Then yesterday, as I cautiously made my way to my car, once again the blackbird dived dangerously close to my head. As he passed me on the right, suddenly a second one passed just as close on the left.

They're grouping together now. This can't be good.

Monday, June 23, 2008

Monday Morning

This morning we woke up with sore backs, pulled muscles, sprains, bruises and sunburns.

Consequences of the awesome weekend we had jogging, golfing, swimming, and playing soccer.

I love summertime.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Election 2008

For those who are still undecided as to who they should vote for in November:

I dreamt last night that I was at a huge informal party with tons of people there. As I was walking around and mingling I noticed that also there were John McCain, Bill, Hillary and Chelsea Clinton, and Barack Obama. Here were my interactions with each:

John McCain - As I sat down with a plate of finger food he walked up and introduced himself with a nice handshake. There were about 10 seconds of small talk before he left. Nothing really memorable.

The Clintons - After John walked away Bill slid over to me (I think we were on a bench or something). He shook my hand but held on a little too long before finally pulling away. And he was a little too close when talking to me that it was uncomfortable. The other Clintons were mingling in other parts of the room. He said that Chelsea could sure use a friend like me around as she travels the country helping her mom out. I said an opportunity to go on someone else's tab and visit all the cool places of this country, yeah I'd go with her. But then he said I'd have to cover my own travel expenses so I shook my head no and he walked away.

Obama - I actually never spoke to him. He didn't circle the room like the others but waited for the people to approach him. I did watch for a few minutes though while he and my brother had a contest of who could tuck in their high fashion dress shirts the quickest. My brother's got caught on his belt so Obama won.

I'm Shaina Burgoyne and I approve this message.

Monday, June 9, 2008

525,600 Minutes

Yesterday was our one year anniversary! Yeah!

So, in commemoration, here is a sonnet - the most romantic of all poetic forms.
It might not be in 100 % perfect iambic pentameter, (Shakespeare even fudged it sometimes) but everything else is true to form - and any one who really scans it to check is an even bigger English dork than me.

So here it is:
*uh hum*

It has been one year since the day we wed
which means fifty-two weeks of marriage bliss.
Day one had begun when our vows were said,
three sixty-five was still sealed with a kiss.

"Newly weds" no more for us, we are wise
and know the secrets, the "don't"s and the "do"s
so we can bless others with our advice -
help them to be a Perfect Couple too.

Be sure that stress and conflicts will befall,
but a quality mattress will cure all.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

The Black! The White! The Blue!

June 3rd 2008 marked the closing of a chapter in history, the final day of the Groves Family at West Jordan High School. Their legacy, like most great things, started small. In 1995 Allan was the first to enter the dull brown brick building with gleaming white and blue lockers, a nervous 15 year old sophomore. Shaina, Elise, and Carynn all followed in his wake. In 2008, proof of the presence the family name had held over the years was seen as Riley accepted his diploma. An almost unanimous shout of "RY-MAN" echoed through the stands. The moment was so empowering that as Riley literally danced his way off the stage, the entire audience sat in stunned silence.

Undoubtedly, the Groves siblings have left their mark at WJHS, both individually and collectively. The following are a few statistics showing the influence of WJHS in the Groves household, and of the Groves on the Home of the Jaguars:

Consecutive years at WJHS: 13 (1995-2008)

Cumulative years attending WJHS: 15

Student Drivers to pass and be licensed: 5

Locker combinations remembered: 25+

Hours of Seminary attended: 2,400 +

Parent/Teacher meetings attended: 30+

Prom Dates: 10

Concerts, shows or other performances attended: 300 +

Lunch breaks taken: 3,000 +

Hours of "Pomp and Circumstance" endured: 10 + (Classes of 1998, 2000, 2002, 2005, 2008)

*numbers are estimates only

Monday, June 2, 2008

50 Nifty United States

A "newsletter" from a business associate at my work comes in the mail every month or so. It's usually just random silly stuff that he finds interesting. This month there was an article on some of the crazy laws on Utah books. I thought I would share some of them with you. And for you out-of-staters, I've included proof that the legal system is whacked out where you are too.

It is illegal not to drink milk. (Actually this one makes sense. Especially if chocolate chip cookies are involved.)
It is illegal to detonate any nuclear weapon. (I see where they're coming from, but how enforcable is this really?)
Birds have the right of way on all highways.
A husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife while she is in his presence. (This opens so many doors ...)
It is a felony to persistently tread on the cracks between paving stones on the sidewalk of a state highway (or you'll break your mamma's back)
It is considered an offense to hunt whales (uh, desert)
Alcohol may not be sold during an emergency (that's what 72 hour kits are for)
It is illegal to cause a catastrophe.

In Kaysville - You must have identification to enter a convienence store after dark.
In Logan - Women may not swear.

Sunshine is guaranteed to the masses.
Women may not drive in a house coat. (Only in Hollywood would there be official fashion laws)

The dog catcher must notify dogs of impounding by posting, for three consecutive days, a notice on a tree in the city park and along a public road running through said park. (what grade level is your dog's reading at?)
It is unlawful to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next-door neighbor. (Sugar, eggs, sure. But there must be limits.)

You may not catch a fish by any body part except the mouth. (I'd like to see someone catch one with their mouth!)
You may not sing in the bathtub (That's why Mike likes it so much here!)

Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more on private property. (Again with dogs. If you've seen my parent's dog, you'll know they really aren't the smartest species out there.)
Oklahoma will not tolerate anyone taking a bite out of another’s hamburger.

A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed. (That's why there is no "CSI: Houston")

You may not take a picture of a rabbit from January to April without an official permit. (shh! Be very quiet... we're photographing wabbits.)

It is illegal to manufacture imitation cocaine. (those purists!)
When being attacked by a criminal or burglar, you may only protect yourself with the same weapon that the other person posseses (fair is fair, after all).

*I got these from if you want to check out more!
** Also check out how smart you are at