Take me to the Fair!

A few weeks ago we had our niece and nephews for the evening and decided to take them to our city's little carnival. They had so many adventures!

Flying a spaceship:

4 wheeling through the desert:


Riding on the back of a green lady bug (the landing is the hardest part and obviously takes lots of concentration):

The little one had to stay in the same ride the whole time, but he provided lots of moral support to the others.

Aren't these kids the cutest? We couldn't like them more than if they were our own (ok maybe a little bit more if they were ours, but not much)!

Summer Nights

In case any of you have been wondering why I haven't posted anything in the last month it's because we were busy working with my family and some friends on


Transforming this ...



into all of this...









(The show was Guys and Dolls)


And these pictures don't even show how all the moving doors, panels, and flaps worked together to make each new scene!

Needless to say there were hours upons hours of work (sometimes going until 3 or 4 in the morning) put into this. But, the show must go on! AND we got the stamp of approval from the toughest stage design critics in the state - Grandma and Grandpa Dodge.

We took a couple of weeks to catch up on sleep and spend some time with Mike's family back East (pitures to come soon) but ...

Planning/Construction on the next set starts Wednesday!
See you in September!

Handmade By Me!

I only do these sort of posts if I think they are really cool, and this one is:

OK! So this is how this works...The first 3 people to respond to this post will receive something made by me, just for you. Of course there are some restrictions and limitations:

1. I make no guarantees that you will like what I make! :)
2. What I create will be just for you.
3. It will be done some time within the next year.
4. You have no clue what it will be.
5. I will send it anywhere! It doesn't matter where you live!

The catch? The catch is that you must re-post this on your own blog and offer the same to the first 3 people who do the same on their blog. The first 3 people to do so and leave a comment telling me they did will win a FAB-U-LOUS homemade gift by me!!

(I was the first to sign up on my friend's blog, so now I'm doing my part...)

If you don't have a blog you can still comment and just make three things for whoever you'd like instead of waiting for them to sign up.

Be sure to post a picture of what you win when you get it!

06/01

June 1st is an important day. To find out some reasons why go here:

http://www.history.com/this-day-in-history.do

and enter 6/1


Another reason it is an important day is because important people were born this day like the following:

Brigham Young
Marilyn Monroe
Morgan Freeman
Dr. Bill Burgoyne (my father-in-law)
and me

Now before you start judging me for selfishly blogging about my own birthday, just remember, if I hadn't been born you would have one less blog to waste your time reading. Just think about that.

In the criminal justice world

I don’t mean to dwell on the unpleasant, but I was thinking last night that if something horrible ever happened to me or someone I love I would like the following team assigned to the case:

Dr. Brennan and the Smithsonian crew heading up the forensics
Agent Booth and Detectives Green and Lupo on the investigation
The Lightman Group handling all of the interrogations
District Attorney Jack McCoy prosecuting the suspects (with ADA Connie just for Mike)

After I had carefully thought all of that out I also thought this:

Maybe I should make tomorrow a “no tv” night...

Hey Mom - look what I did!

Every summer growing up my mom would take my sisters and I to a craft or fabric store with the assignment to pick out a project that we would work on while we were out of school.

I picked a lot of projects, I started a lot projects, and now my mom has a box full of unfinished projects sitting her in basement.

This winter I decided it was time I finally saw a project through to the end - I made a baby blanket for one of my closest friends expecting a son in a few weeks.




There may be more than a few uneven stitches in it, and I spent a lot of time with the seam ripper, but hey - it's finished!

Road Rage

This morning driving to work I was patiently going 25 miles per hour (the posted and enforced speed limit) through the neighborhood when I white impala got behind me and impatiently rode my tail all the way to the main street.

I waited for traffic clear and found a moment of opportunity to safely turn left over the railroad tracks and onto the road. The impala did not wait but quickly screeched out into the road, giving the drivers in the oncoming lanes I'm sure a bit of a rush.

I approached the next intersection, which is a 4-way stop, at the regular speed limit preparing to turn right. The impala sped past me and as the driver also prepared to turn at the 4-way stop I noticed that he didn't even bother with a turn signal.

I thought "What a rude driver. Seriously." Then I pulled up behind him and noticed the license plate:

Government Vehicle - For Official Use Only


There has got be a good joke or analogy someone can make of this story.

Shopping Spree

I usually don't like to go shopping for myself, and I usually don't write mushy things about how wonderful Mike is on my blog.
But this weekend is an exception.

I thought I was going to a girls lunch out on Saturday. Really, that was just part of the plan to get me out of the house. As we were all leaving, I found out that Mike had arranged for the girls to "kidnap" me with specific instructions on how we were to spend our afternoon: shopping.

We all had envelopes of cash (provided by a work bonus, so not anything I was planning on) and had to spend our entire amount spoiling ourselves at the Park City outlets that day.

Mike had planned it well. There was no way I could get out of being practical with the money. My only option was to shut up and shop. So I did.

With a spending budget and a staff of personal fashion experts (my sisters) I actually had a great time shopping.

I love Mike for thinking of me and treating me to a worry-free self-indulgent day. He is such an awesome husband!

Roommate Reunion

This week the girls of Alta 312 were reunited for a few hours (we missed you Sarah and Brittany)!

This week the guys of WQ 6 also all got together for a few hours.


It's great to have friends that you know will be some of your favorite people in the world for the rest if your life.

Luck o' The Irish

St.Patrick's Day is one of our favorite holidays and Mike has some Irish blood in him. So in honor of the day and our heritage, here are some Irish thoughts for all of you:

May those that love us, love us.
And those that don’t love us,
May God turn their hearts.
And if he doesn’t turn their hearts,
May he turn their ankles,
So we’ll know them by their limping.

If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the kind of people He gives it to!

May your home always be too small to hold all your friends.

May you have food and raiment, a soft pillow for your head. May you be forty years in heaven before the devil knows you’re dead.

May you get all your wishes but one,
so that you will always have something to strive for!

Some Guinness was spilled on the barroom floor
when the pub was shut for the night.
Out of his hole crept a wee brown mouse
and stood in the pale moonlight.
He lapped up the frothy brew from the floor,
then back on his haunches he sat.
And all night long you could hear him roar,
'Bring on the cat!'

What are the Odds?

Mike and I took a short trip to the fabulous city of Las Vegas this weekend. While I am not ready to be regular bookie yet, I did learn a few things about numbers, chance, and luck while there.

2 for 1 - the deal we got on our hotel and all of our food since Mike was officially there on business.

10 to 6 - the ratio of advertisements for call girls and burlesque shows to advertisements for the Donny and Marie Osmond show. I never would have guessed I'd be seeing so much Donny and Marie in that city.

100 to 3 - people per square foot on "the strip" compared to "old downtown Vegas."

0 to 1 - the chance that we will ever buy the kind of car we rented, a Chevy HHR.

1,000 to 20 - the cash some people carelessly drop versus what we so tightly budgeted for as "fun" money.

1 to 3 - the chance of being asked to show ID when sitting down at any betting table.(or maybe we just look that old?)

1,000,000,000 to 1 - the odds of Mike convincing me to put all of our life savings on the roulette table.

Language Barriers

So the other week at church I saw a sign up list for people to volunteer at some ESL classes that the community has organized helping people who are trying to learn English.

It has been a while since I have volunteered for anything so I thought it wouldn't hurt to put my name down. I could step in for an hour here or there when needed, sure.

Well, I misunderstood the information I read and found out later that in putting my name down I had committed myself to TEACH the class EVERY Tuesday for the next 12 WEEKS!

Talk about a communication problem.

The Happiest Day of our Lives

On Sunday February 1st, 2009 Michael and Shaina celebrated an important milestone in their relationship and their future.

The couple chose to keep things simple, joined only by a few close friends and family:

They looked stunning in their formal wear:

The cake was as delicious as it was beautiful:

The traditional first slice:

In lieu of gifts, the couple kindly asks that all congratulations be sent in the form of cash donations.

Moving on Up (or South or whatever)

Basement Apartment rented in Pleasant Grove, Utah.

2 bedrooms (yes, 2) 1 bath
washer/dryer not included - but owning your own is kinda nice
utilities included: Internet, Direct TV, and DVR
Huge pantry in the kitchen
secret staircase to nowhere behind bookshelf

1st month's rent includes leaky drain that will soak the carpet in the master bedroom, but deposit covers game night with the great family that lives upstairs.

Perfect for a nice, incredibly good-looking couple relocating from Draper. Close to freeway, shopping, movies, and restaurants. 12 minute commute to popular offices in Orem.


I love the bathroom, weird I know but it's the only place where I am perfectly happy with the way it looks.



One more picture needs to be hung, but otherwise a comfortable and cozy home.

Pictures don't do it justice, this is one you must come see in person! Call immediately to make an appointment!

Have You Ever....

gone snowshoeing? Mike and I went this weekend with my cousin Rachel and Mike's brother Ben. Turns out, it's a lot of fun. If you get a chance, go.

Holiday Update

I figured I would finally get around to putting up some pictures from Christmas (like finally getting around to taking down the decorations from Christmas). The thing is, I didn't take very many pictures. But I will tell you that we had a great time with Mike's mom in town and all of the fun things my family had planned, and Mike's birthday.

2 days after Christmas we took on the airport craziness and went to PA for 8 days to see Mike's dad Bill and stepmom Sally. That was a nice week of mostly relaxing in front of the fire and sleeping in.

We did get away to New York City for a day and saw the Christmas tree at Rockafeller, ate at a trendy NY restaurant, and ran into a celebrity (Keith Olberman). Of course we "caught a show" on Broadway (a comedy called Alfred Hitchcock's 39 Steps), and it was too cold to walk around the city so we took the subway, which was fast, but smelled bad.

The best part of the holidays though was having the Burgoyne men (Mike, Bill, and Grandpa) together in Pittsburgh

And playing with Bill's woodworking power tools

Even I got into the fun (with adult supervision of course)

No joke ... or tease!

I saw this commercial on tv and about died laughing.

This is for all the girls out there who have ever teased their hair, tried to tease their hair (I admit, I had an unsuccessful tease stage in 6th grade), or made of fun of those who teased their hair.

I heard once that "big hair" was a trait of "utah mormons" but now everyone can enjoy it!

go to www.bighappyhair.com

P.S. I promise to catch up on the past 2 weeks, but this was too good to postpone.

My good Samaritan (times 6)

Over Christmas we spent a lot of time in Provo at my sister-in-law's house. Over Christmas it also snowed a lot. Becca (the sister-in-law) has a driveway that sort of dips down to the sidewalk and then climbs up again to the street.

One night while we were leaving the house my car got stuck in the snow at the dip down part. Luckily, a nice BYU student was hurrying to get in time for curfew and stopped to give me a push out. He was my first Good Samaritan.

A few days later, after another storm, I helped shovel the driveway and made extra sure the dip down part was all clear of ice and snow. But, when I left to run an errand, my car got stuck in the snow at the climb up part and it took 2 nice BYU students and a young couple (yep total of 4 people) to push me out. They were Good Samaritans 2 through 5.

That same day, when returning from my errand, I thought I would be smart and park on the street instead of the driveway. I stopped the car and *thunk* it sunk into the extra deep gutter that was impossible to see from the snow in the street. That's when Good Samaritan 6 showed up with a huge SUV and a tow rope. I was out of the gutter in no time, despite my embarrasment.

So this winter, if you are out and about and see someone who might be in need, stop and help them. Pay it forward on my behalf.

Meanwhile, I might have to start taking the bus, or maybe sled dogs, to get around in the snow.

Jingle Bells Batman Smells

I like Christmas songs, really I do. But as I was listening to some today, I couldn't help but think that a few of them could be updated, made a little more realistic maybe. Here's what I've got so far:

Baby it's cold outside - I really can't stay - but baby it's cold outside - I've gotta go away - fine, but for the last time, it's cold outside will you shut the door already?

and

Last Christmas I gave you a sweater, but the very next day, you gave it away (for store credit). So this year, to save me from tears, I'll give you a gift card - that's special (special).

and

Oh the weather outside is frightful! But the bills don't pay themselves. So off to work I must go! I hate driving in the snow! driving in the snow! driving in the snow!

And my personal favorite:

I got a hippopotamus butt for Christmas. And hippopotamus thighs too. I didn't work out, I only ate junk. I gotta hippopotamus butt for Christmas.

Ok I know they are still a little rough around the edges, but I sense some big hits.

Any other suggestions to add to the album?

Perspective

Imagine if you will that it's Saturday night - you and your spouse are out to do some Christmas shopping. You're on the freeway when suddenly the radio starts cutting out and the headlights start to dim. The battery light on the dash starts to flash. You move to the far right lane and count it as a small miracle that you're able to get off the road and into a gas station parking lot before the car completely gives out. Then you have to wait in the cold for the tow truck who of course is an hour late. He is able to take you and your car to a repair shop near your home, but has to charge for part of the ride since it's out of his 5 mile range, all the while you're thinking how much this repair is going to cost you and that this isn't exactly the most convenient time of year for an extra expense like this.

Sounds pretty miserable, right?

Now imagine that while you were waiting for the tow truck your car had just enough juice left in it to run the radio so you pop in the next CD of the Book on CD you've been listening to. It's the Fire of the Covenant by Gerald Lund, about the Willie and Martin handcart companies. You're listening to the part where they are crossing rivers in the snow and they know that they will be out of food days before any rescue party from Salt Lake can reach them.



Suddenly, your situation seems pretty peachy.

Thanksgiving Thankfulness

Things I was thankful for this Thanksgiving weekend:

- Paid time off so that we could afford to go out of town
- Portable DVD players, books on CD, and just regular books to pass the hours in the car
- The grass stains, scrapes, and sore muscles Mike got from playing football, something he loves to do and doesn't get a chance to often.
- pumpkin pie and BYU chocolate milk - mmm boy!
- Joann's fabric store at 6:00 am and the Twilight movie which are great for sister-in-law bonding.
- Dollar stores - they provided an excellent surprise 30th birthday party
- Cozy pants and tennis shoes for 5 whole days
- Caffeinated beverages that convinced me that it wasn't too late for one more game each night
- The combination of a church gym, a variety of balls and bats, and the Burgoyne's imagination
- The Internet,weather cameras, and cell phones so that our trip home was only delayed a few hours that we spent inside instead of a day or more stuck on the road during a snow storm.
- The little cold I started getting on the last day because I got it from hugging and holding our nieces and nephews.
- That beautiful feeling after days on vacation and hours on the road to crawl into your very own comfy bed.

35 Shopping Days Left

The other day I was running some errands and you'll never guess who I ran into... the big man himself





He was wearing jeans and a red turtleneck, but I swear it was him. (I wanted to take a picture with my cell phone but couldn't figure out a way to do that without looking like a crazy stalker or something).
But I bet you'll never guess what store I saw him in...





I guess everyone is cutting back their shopping budget this year.

Freebies!

I don't know about anyone else, but I love FREE stuff. Even little FREE stuff like the samples you can get at walmart.com or when companies give you FREE pens or sticky notes. I don't even mind used FREE stuff like a skirt from my sister or a sweater from my aunt because they just don't want it anymore. But I especially like NICE FREE stuff.
Like last night when Mike's work sent him an email saying that the crowd was looking pretty small for dinner at this 2 day conference they've been putting on for some clients. So they said he could bring his wife to help fill in seats. Of course we went - FREE dinner. It was at the Snowbird Ski Resort and they served fancy stuff like "tomato bisque","seared salmon","roasted butternut squash", and my favorite, chocolate torte and cheesecake.We even got to stick around and watch the stand up comedian they had hired, Johnny Bee, for FREE. We found out that one of the guests had checked out a night early and Mike's work still had to pay for a room that no one was going to stay in. So guess what, we got to stay overnight at the resort for FREE and when we got to our room there was a FREE Box of chocolate truffles.

What's this "economic downturn" everyone is talking about?

This is Halloween! Halloween!

Once again the Burgoynes celebrate All Hallows Eve with the annual Scary Dinner and Halloween party. This year it was really a red carpet event with all the big names that made an appearance. The food of the party is always the main feature, of course, and the menu included many gourmet dishes:




Over all the event was fabulous, and as tradition goes, each year out performs the previous. Anticipation for the 2009 gala is already building!

For the Strength of the Youth

I'd like to bare my testimony about the YM/YW organizations of the church and their activities.
I know with every the fiber of my being that they are so much cooler when you participate as a volunteer for the scavanger hunt and not because your mom made you.
And I know with all my heart that it totally rocks when they tell the volunteers that they can wear disguises if they want.

I also know without a shadow of a doubt, that they had no idea who they were talking to when they asked Mike and I to help out.

Our disguises:

The pictures don't capture the true awesomeness of our disguises, but really, they freakin' rocked! No one recognized us at all. At one point, Mike started getting up in one group's face and accusing them of "looking at his girl". Eventually a leader recognized him and started laughing, but before that I think one of the deacons wet himself.

That was fun, now what?

Dear Mark and Paul,
Thank you for the opportunity to work at The Insight Group. I have learned a lot during my time here and have truly enjoyed the experience.
However, the time has come for me to move on. This letter is to formally announce my resignation from The Insight Group starting today. I understand that this creates an extra work load for the office staff. Therefore, I am willing to stay at the Insight Group until the 23rd of December, providing time for a replacement to be hired and trained. I hope this will help in the transition process.

Again, I am grateful for all that I have gained during my time with The Insight Group. Please let me know what I can do to make my final time here a productive experience.
Best Regards,

Shaina Burgoyne

This is the formal letter I wrote to say I was quitting my job at the end of the year. (I thought it was extra generous of me to give them this much of a notice). I ended up not using the letter, but just saying all of it face-to-face with my bosses.

For as many times as I had daydreamed of that moment, I'm proud of myself for how nice I acted when it actually happened.

Maybe I can still save the big "lashing out and telling them what I really think of the way they run their business" speech for my last day. That gives me a few more months to perfect it.


P.S. Anyone out there hiring?

Mamma Mia! Mandate Voci!

Did you seriously think I was not going to write about the Saturday Morning session of conference? C'mon.

It was exactly 5 years ago this week that I entered the MTC to go to Italy. So for exactly 5 years I have been praying for a temple in that country.

I was so surprised to have that answer finally come this weekend when President Monson announced that construction will soon begin on the Rome, Italy temple. I was shaking a little I was so happy. (A temple near Mike's hometown in Philadelphia was a very nice bonus. It couldn't have been better if Pres Monson had asked us to pick the next two ourselves. I feel like we won the temple lottery).

Anyway, I had heard rumors of how close Rome was to getting a temple since I had started taking Italian 101 classes back in 2001. The rumors got more exciting when I actually got to Italy. My sources (the Italian Relief Society Network) told me that back in the 1970's a bunch of members put up the money to buy a parcel of land right in the middle of Rome, just to be prepared. Also:
- that President Hinckley had said that he hoped to announce the construction of the Rome temple at conference before he died
- that Italy just needed 100 more priesthood holders for the church to be big enough (or 1 more stake or 2 more wards or some qualifying number like that, it changed sometimes)
- that it would be built soon but the church has to pay for the all the power lines in that part of the city to be rerouted underground so the steeple can be built
- and my favorite was that the design and location had already been approved and it just so happens that when the sun hits the temple in the middle of the day the steeple and the angel Moroni will cast a shadow that will cut right through the middle of the Vatican.

Ok, so I'm sure most of that was exaggerated versions of some tidbit of truth. But what is true is how this will bless the people of Italy and a lot of Europe too. The members I worked with had to take 20+ hour bus rides to get the temple. It cost a lot of money, and they usually only had 1 trip per year scheduled. Rome is only 6 hours away.

The faces of all the members I grew to love kept coming to memory during the rest of the day. I couldn't help but picture their joy as they sat in their small chapels or rented out rooms that make up a meeting house and listened to that announcement. I wish I was with them. Maybe I can save up enough to be with them at the dedication...

Election Time!

No, we're not talking McCain/Obama, that's for another day. This is a much more important issue.

On Saturday Mike and I went to the RSL vs Chivas game. It was great. The week before we went to the BYU vs UCLA game. Also great. This got me thinking, if I had to choose a favorite between Football and Futbol, which would I pick?

I worked out some possible arguments for both sides.
(F = Football, S = Soccer)

1. Game Day
F: With the pregame show, the tailgate party, 4 hours for the game itself and then the post game analysis, the excitement lasts literally all day long.
S: You go, you cheer, you have fun, you get on with the rest of your life.

2. The Game
F: Complicated rules with even more complicated plays displays a sense of intelligence just to understand the action. Yet it's still just big guys crashing into each other at full speed while playing keep away.
S: Simple rules (ball in net, no hands), simple plays. A lot of aggression but an element of finesse to make it happen.

3. The Players and their drama
F: Talking tough, playing rough, and showing their need for attention in end zone celebrations and sideline fights. But the real drama is their off the field lifestyles.
S: Real fouls that are never seen (unless they draw blood) and then the fake flops and falls to remind everyone that they are still there. Who knows what they do off the field. Who cares.

4. The "Big Game"
F: The Super Bowl brings in more money and attention than anything else on tv. But is it the game or the commercials?
S: The World Cup is a world wide event. But you have to wait 4 years until the next one. Still, that's 4 years of bragging rights (Italia 2006!).

5. Cultural Impact
F: Arguably America's most popular sport right now. Knowing a few things about the teams and the players can get you small talk with just about anyone and earn you respect with the guys at the office and your father-in-law. You just can't avoid the in-state college rivalry.
S: The world's most popular sport. In the States, popular among kids, and the fastest growing in popularity among adults. But locally, only the die-hard fans will know who's playing and what's happening. Not a general conversation topic yet.

So, time to vote! Which would you pick and why?

Spittin' Image

(Monday morning)

Coworker: Shaina, I have to tell you what happened this weekend.
Shaina: Oh really, what?
Coworker: Well my stake got reorganized, and since I'm a branch president in the stake I got to go to a special meeting with the General Authorities who were doing the reorganizing.
Shaina: Wow, that's great.
Coworker: So I walk into the room and it's Elder Nelson of the 12 and Elder LeGrand Curtis of the 70. They both stand up to shake my hand and smile as I meet them. Well, the instant Elder Curtis smiled at me, the first thing I thought was "wow, he reminds me so much of Mike Burgoyne." Wierd huh?



You're telling me. Should I be worried that a an old man reminds him of my husband? Or complimented that he thinks my husband has a GA smile?



Elder LeGrand Curtis, Jr. of the 5th Quorum of the Seventy

My Book Buffet

This summer I worked my way through a 4 course meal of literature. Some courses I liked better than others, but overall it was very satisfying. Here is what I read:

Journey to the Center of the Earth (Jules Verne): Supposed to be one of the great forerunners to Science Fiction. I liked the idea, but couldn't get through all the scientific jargon to make it even to the half way point. It was like eating bran cereal; too much fiber and not enough taste to make it worth my time.

The Twilight Series (Stephanie Meyers): Yep, I gave in to peer pressure and read all 4 of them. It was a great way to pass the 30+ hours I spent in the car during 2 road trips. They weren't brilliant works of literature, but I was entertained. It was like eating grocery store birthday cake - good for the moment, no real nutritional value, and sometimes you can't take in too much in one sitting without getting sick, but you know that if it's around you're going to want a piece. And it's much better when it's shared with others.

Oliver Twist (Charles Dickens): Unfortunately, I approached this one with a bias, I already love Dickens. This was good, but not great. Really good characters, intriguing moral themes and brilliant social satire, but way wordy and a little far fetched. It's like how the casseroles I cook turn out: I worry so much about getting it right that I over do it and it ends up just tasting weird.

The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes, Vol 2 (Sir Arthur Conan Doyle): This was by far my favorite. It was well written, entertaining, explored different aspects of human nature, and I felt smarter after reading it (especially when I could start putting the solution together before Holmes!) And each story was short but fulfilling so I could either nibble a little or chow down as I wanted. It was perfectly flavored and in perfect proportions. It won't be long before I go back for a second helping.

You're a good man, Homer Simpson

In my office when someone has a birthday we all take an hour break and sit around eating cake and talking. Also in my office, there is one person who enjoys doing most of the talking. He happens to the be the boss too.

Today was someone's birthday. I ordered a lemon raspberry cake with cream cheese frosting. The boss told a 25 minute story about the remodel he's doing on his house.
This was my experience:

Boss story:




My train of thought:


Mmmm cream cheese frosting.

Seriously, that's exactly what was like.

An Inspiration

So I've been watching a lot of the Olympic Games. I mean many, many hours each day. Too much? Maybe, except that watching the athletes has kind of inspired me. So I decided today I was going to go all Michael Phelphs and swim laps in our apartment pool - just for the fun of it. (I even learned how to do the different strokes from the Internet. Yeah, I'm that bad).

I had previously checked that there was no one else around to watch me. I'm not ready for judges yet. So, I get all ready and head to the pool. When I get to the pool, however, I can't get in. It's locked for cleaning!

That's twice this summer that they closed the pool, but I didn't find out until I was already at the gate.

Don't these people know how much effort it takes for a woman to put on a swimsuit and go out in public wearing it? The mental strength! The emotional stability! The shaving!


I deserve a gold medal just for making it to the gate!

I might have some Gold Meadow Mint Chocolate in the freezer.... that's close enough for me!

Home Again

You know that uneasy feeling you get in the pit of your stomach on Sunday nights when you realize the next morning you have to go to work again? Coming home from vacation is like that - only worse.

You know the headache you get when you've just finished making a huge batch of cookies and you see all the mess that activity has caused that now needs to be cleaned up? Unpacking from vacation is like that - only worse.

You know the dizziness you feel when you stare too long at one of those "hidden 3-D image" pictures and still can't see the jumping dolphins or whatever? Sorting out the budget after a vacation is like that - only worse.

So with the uneasy stomach, headache, and dizziness coming home has caused, maybe I should stay in bed just one more day....right?

Cultural Insight

I try not to be one of those dorky missionaries who always talks about the cool places they were in and what they do, but....

Italians are very good at taking vacation. One holiday I particularly am in favor of is Ferragosto. Basically the whole country shuts down for the month of August and goes to the beach. I think the US can learn from this.

The official day of Ferragosto is August 15th. EVERYONE is gone that day. Most people show so much dedication to the purpose of the holiday (either the ascension of the Virgin Mary into heaven or the goddess Diana and her fertility depending on your research source) that they take at least the week and usually the month off of work.

Anyway, the point is, this week in August is dedicated to doing nothing but relaxing and having fun. We plan to celebrate this whole-heartedly as we leave for Colorado. (Not a beach, but whatever). We hope you do too in any way you can. Maybe we'll start a trend.

(reads: closed for holiday will reopen Friday August 24th. Maybe.)

Minutes taken from the Burgoyne Blog Planning/Writing Committee Meeting:

• Events of Note since last blog:
  - Noah (nephew) born - practical joker already by spending 10 days in NICU just for fun but home now.
  - Cousin Carolyn married, beautiful wedding and time with family was almost worth the 2 hour delay at the airport.
  - Mamma Burgoyne's visit. Much fun and much dessert!!
  - Papa (Mike's grandpa) passed away. Described as author of all that is silly and fun in the family. He's home now too.
  
  
• Accomplishments/Areas for Improvement:
  - Shaina finished spring cleaning the apartment. Mike being away on business made throwing out clutter a more efficient process.
  - While Mike was away he picked out a dress for Shaina all by himself. Correct size too. Under consideration for advancement to head of the Fashion Committee.
  - Meeting scheduled with Budget Committee to review need of driving versus need of eating.
  
  
• Upcoming Events:
  - Groves' family trip to Durango
  - Football Season
  

Runner 5313

I know many have been anticipating this... the results are finally in from the "big run" yesterday.

I was able to talk my brother and sister into running with me, which made it even more fun.

Here are the stats for the 5k:

Out of 219 runners...

Riley was 31st with a time of 23:48:8 (3rd out of 17 in his age group)

I was 69th with a time of 27:40:9 (7th out of 31 in my age group)

Carynn was 120th with a time of 32:20:3. (11th out of 24 in her age group)



I was just glad that being the first real race for all of us we at least crossed the finish line, but it's a little sweeter that none of us were even in the bottom 1/4 of the ranking!




Now that I am an expert in running, let me share some of the wisdom I've gained in the past 3 months:



- Good shoes really do make a world of difference.

- Waking up at 5:30 to run still sucks, even if you've been doing it for 3 months and it's the day before your race.

- Running outside is better in the morning when there aren't people around and it's not hot

- Running on a treadmill only works if there is something really good on tv to watch while you run.

- It really is the diet + exercise formula that works because even when you exercise 4 times a week, if you eat a lot of cupcakes, ice cream and cookies, your high school jeans still won't fit.

- Crossing the finish line is a great feeling, no matter what time it was at.


There are more races coming up in August and September, if anyone else wants to join in the fun!

Shaina's Spa and Resort

*Spa is only open on weekends when Mike is out of town and Shaina is left home alone on a Friday night and can only service one person (Shaina) per day.

Services include:

* scrumptious dinner of all salad and no meat
* complete facial with the exclusive exfoliating scrub with olive oil extractsfollowed by an avacado mud mask to purify and mosturize
* overnight hair repair treatment with a deep conditioner the next morning
* free showing of the best chic flics cable has to offer, ice cream optional (this week's movie of choice was Little Women)
* a luxurious queen size bed all to your self with no snoring or morning breath to bother you and no one else to steal the sheets

Also available: hot tub, pedicures/manicures and pilates classes (well, a DVD).

Total cost: $4.00 (for salad and ice cream) thanks to the free samples in the mail, newspapers, and grocery store.

I'd prefer to have Mike home with me every weekend, but when he does have to leave, at least I make the most of it!

Office Romance

*Some people are married to their jobs, we're just dating ours*

A couple is dating. One person decides that things aren’t really going as well they used to be and that they aren’t really as happy in that relationship as they thought they would be. The “maybe it’s time to break up” idea starts forming in the back of their mind. They have nearly reached a definite “I want out” when suddenly something happens: flowers for no reason, a real engaging conversation, or just a great doorstep scene, and the person starts to reconsider. They think “well, maybe things aren’t SO bad, I’ll stay in a little longer and see what happens.”

The “maybe, well maybe not” battle continues, sometimes for years, before any definite action is taken.

I thought I had left all of that behind when I got married. I was wrong. Apparently the mind games that go on in the dating world can also happen in the corporate world.

Lately more than ever, Mike and I have been thinking about how un-thrilled we are with what we’re doing at work. It’s not that we have bad jobs; they just don’t make us really happy anymore. We talk about when and how we can “break up” with work.
Then, this week happened.

My work bought everyone lunch and cupcakes and I had a great morning with one of my coworkers restructuring a process that has been a mess for years. It was like having one of those “engaging conversations” with my job.

Mike’s work took us to Park City and paid for an evening of zipline, alpine slide, and roller coaster rides kicked off by a nice dinner where the head of his department lathered on the flattery and praise for each individual member of the team. It was a sort of “flowers for no reason” night.

So we ended the week with a “well, maybe it’s not SO bad.”

Although, in the back of our minds we’re still thinking about breaking up. Unless an incredible "doorstep scene" raise comes along…

Land that We Love

We are celebrating the 4th of July this year by sleeping in and then attending 4 different BBQs/Picnics.

Lots of food, lots of friends and no work for 3 days.

That's what I call living the American Dream.

GOD BLESS AMERICA!

Hitchcock

I've seen the movie "The Birds" twice. While I appreciate Hitchcock's contribution to cinematic history and have enjoyed some of his other films, this one really didn't do it for me. It might have been the people I watched it with or something, I don't know. But I think if I were to see it again now, I would have a much better appreciation for it. Why? Because now I've lived it.

For the past 2 weeks every day after work, and sometimes at lunch too, when I have walked out of the parking garage at my office this little blackbird has swooped down towards me and continued to fly near me until I reach my car. Each day he has gotten a little closer.

Two days ago I was on guard, looking for him as I careful walked out. At first I didn't see him. Then I turned my head to see his sharp beak coming at full speed straight for my face. I turned and ducked quick enough to feel his wings brush against my head.



Like the silly characters in the movie, I tried to think that there was nothing to it. I was overreacting and anyway it was just one bird that was acting crazy.

Then yesterday, as I cautiously made my way to my car, once again the blackbird dived dangerously close to my head. As he passed me on the right, suddenly a second one passed just as close on the left.

They're grouping together now. This can't be good.

Monday Morning

This morning we woke up with sore backs, pulled muscles, sprains, bruises and sunburns.

Consequences of the awesome weekend we had jogging, golfing, swimming, and playing soccer.

I love summertime.

Election 2008

For those who are still undecided as to who they should vote for in November:

I dreamt last night that I was at a huge informal party with tons of people there. As I was walking around and mingling I noticed that also there were John McCain, Bill, Hillary and Chelsea Clinton, and Barack Obama. Here were my interactions with each:

John McCain - As I sat down with a plate of finger food he walked up and introduced himself with a nice handshake. There were about 10 seconds of small talk before he left. Nothing really memorable.

The Clintons - After John walked away Bill slid over to me (I think we were on a bench or something). He shook my hand but held on a little too long before finally pulling away. And he was a little too close when talking to me that it was uncomfortable. The other Clintons were mingling in other parts of the room. He said that Chelsea could sure use a friend like me around as she travels the country helping her mom out. I said an opportunity to go on someone else's tab and visit all the cool places of this country, yeah I'd go with her. But then he said I'd have to cover my own travel expenses so I shook my head no and he walked away.

Obama - I actually never spoke to him. He didn't circle the room like the others but waited for the people to approach him. I did watch for a few minutes though while he and my brother had a contest of who could tuck in their high fashion dress shirts the quickest. My brother's got caught on his belt so Obama won.

I'm Shaina Burgoyne and I approve this message.

525,600 Minutes

Yesterday was our one year anniversary! Yeah!

So, in commemoration, here is a sonnet - the most romantic of all poetic forms.
It might not be in 100 % perfect iambic pentameter, (Shakespeare even fudged it sometimes) but everything else is true to form - and any one who really scans it to check is an even bigger English dork than me.

So here it is:
*uh hum*

It has been one year since the day we wed
which means fifty-two weeks of marriage bliss.
Day one had begun when our vows were said,
three sixty-five was still sealed with a kiss.

"Newly weds" no more for us, we are wise
and know the secrets, the "don't"s and the "do"s
so we can bless others with our advice -
help them to be a Perfect Couple too.

Be sure that stress and conflicts will befall,
but a quality mattress will cure all.

The Black! The White! The Blue!

June 3rd 2008 marked the closing of a chapter in history, the final day of the Groves Family at West Jordan High School. Their legacy, like most great things, started small. In 1995 Allan was the first to enter the dull brown brick building with gleaming white and blue lockers, a nervous 15 year old sophomore. Shaina, Elise, and Carynn all followed in his wake. In 2008, proof of the presence the family name had held over the years was seen as Riley accepted his diploma. An almost unanimous shout of "RY-MAN" echoed through the stands. The moment was so empowering that as Riley literally danced his way off the stage, the entire audience sat in stunned silence.

Undoubtedly, the Groves siblings have left their mark at WJHS, both individually and collectively. The following are a few statistics showing the influence of WJHS in the Groves household, and of the Groves on the Home of the Jaguars:



Consecutive years at WJHS: 13 (1995-2008)

Cumulative years attending WJHS: 15

Student Drivers to pass and be licensed: 5

Locker combinations remembered: 25+

Hours of Seminary attended: 2,400 +

Parent/Teacher meetings attended: 30+

Prom Dates: 10

Concerts, shows or other performances attended: 300 +

Lunch breaks taken: 3,000 +

Hours of "Pomp and Circumstance" endured: 10 + (Classes of 1998, 2000, 2002, 2005, 2008)



*numbers are estimates only

50 Nifty United States

A "newsletter" from a business associate at my work comes in the mail every month or so. It's usually just random silly stuff that he finds interesting. This month there was an article on some of the crazy laws on Utah books. I thought I would share some of them with you. And for you out-of-staters, I've included proof that the legal system is whacked out where you are too.

Utah:
It is illegal not to drink milk. (Actually this one makes sense. Especially if chocolate chip cookies are involved.)
It is illegal to detonate any nuclear weapon. (I see where they're coming from, but how enforcable is this really?)
Birds have the right of way on all highways.
A husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife while she is in his presence. (This opens so many doors ...)
It is a felony to persistently tread on the cracks between paving stones on the sidewalk of a state highway (or you'll break your mamma's back)
It is considered an offense to hunt whales (uh, desert)
Alcohol may not be sold during an emergency (that's what 72 hour kits are for)
It is illegal to cause a catastrophe.

In Kaysville - You must have identification to enter a convienence store after dark.
In Logan - Women may not swear.

California:
Sunshine is guaranteed to the masses.
Women may not drive in a house coat. (Only in Hollywood would there be official fashion laws)

Colorado:
The dog catcher must notify dogs of impounding by posting, for three consecutive days, a notice on a tree in the city park and along a public road running through said park. (what grade level is your dog's reading at?)
It is unlawful to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next-door neighbor. (Sugar, eggs, sure. But there must be limits.)

Pennsylvania:
You may not catch a fish by any body part except the mouth. (I'd like to see someone catch one with their mouth!)
You may not sing in the bathtub (That's why Mike likes it so much here!)

Oklahoma:
Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more on private property. (Again with dogs. If you've seen my parent's dog, you'll know they really aren't the smartest species out there.)
Oklahoma will not tolerate anyone taking a bite out of another’s hamburger.

Texas:
A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed. (That's why there is no "CSI: Houston")

Wyoming:
You may not take a picture of a rabbit from January to April without an official permit. (shh! Be very quiet... we're photographing wabbits.)

Arizona:
It is illegal to manufacture imitation cocaine. (those purists!)
When being attacked by a criminal or burglar, you may only protect yourself with the same weapon that the other person posseses (fair is fair, after all).

*I got these from www.dumblaws.com if you want to check out more!
** Also check out how smart you are at
http://www.lizardpoint.com/fun/geoquiz/usaquiz.html

As if! It is so true!

So do you like ever have one of those days where you totally know that it's like a perfect hair day?
OMH I like totally had the most perfect of perfect hair days on Monday. I was like doing stuff around my house or whatever and it was like 7:00 at night and I happened to walk past a mirror and it was like Whoa! check out that hair! So of course to my husband I was like "look at how great my hair is today!" and he was like "uh-huh" or whatever, but I mean, he's like a guy so whatever, he doesn't get it.
But really, it was like SO totally soft and straight and clean. I mean it's almost always clean, but by the end of the day it's like never all straight and usually it only looks good, like really good, for the first hour of the day and or whatever and then it's like way blah for the rest of the day.
So like a day when it's perfect all day and I didn't even go to the salon or anything is like seriously one of the best days of my life, like ever!

What's in a name

Don't you think that names are so interesting?

My dad knew a guy whose name was Harry Pitts. I knew a girl who married a Skank (but what about a Harry Skank?). Burgoyne isn't too wierd - although now telemarketers can't pronouce either my first or last name.

On the day I got married my father-in-law took the time to tell me how important the Burgoyne name is and what a heritage I have to live up to.

Have you ever known someone who lived up to their name perfectly?

Mike and I gained a niece this weekend. Her parents were kind enough to give her the normal name of Isabelle. I wondered if she was the only Isabelle Burgoyne out there, and if not what did history have to reveal about her? So I did what any other person would do and I googled her. It was so much fun that I googled the names of my other neices and nephew too. Here's what I found:

Madelynne Burgoyne - No one else in history seems to have that name. (I knew she was one of a kind!)
Elijah Bell - if history repeats he will most likely be an anesthesiologist or a baptist pastor. (his fascination with things that hurt and kill turn to ways of healing and salvation?)
Hannah Burgoyne - born in Boston in 1713 and now has a facebook page (that I can access if I create an account, it's free and easy!).
Leah Bell - Studied art in Italy for years and now has her own studio on the east coast. (That might make her my favorite now).
Isabelle Burgoyne - only daughter of the revolutionary war general, scorned Adam O'Brian during their love affair. (Watch out for those Irish men!)

I know you're all going to go google your own names now, let me know what kind of heritage you have to follow! (There is no other Shaina Burgoyne, in case you were wondering. Guess I'll have to write history myself).

It's written in the stars

Today is the first day of the Gemini period in the zodiac calendar.
Here's a shout out to all my fellow twins:
(Especially Brigham Young, Marilyn Monroe, Alanis Morissette and my father-in-law Bill who were all born on the very best of the Gemini days - June 1st!)

We are*:
Adaptable and versatile
Communicative and witty
Intellectual and eloquent
Youthful and lively
Nervous and tense
Superficial and inconsistent
Cunning and inquisitive

We like:
Talking
Novelty and the unusual
Variety in life
Multiple projects all going at once
Reading


We dislike:
Feeling tied down
Being in a rut
Mental inaction
Being alone

*source: some astrology website I googled. I really didn't make it up, I promise. It's eerily accurate though.

I've been working on the railroad

Our weekend adventure was so great, it deserved a soundtrack! So feel free to hum aloud as you read! (You might have to be a little creative with the rhythym but I'm sure you can figure it out, you're smart enough).

I've been living in Utah, all my live long day.
But I've not seen all the landmarks that make this place so great.
So I took a little venture
with my husband dear
So we took a little venture
to see the history here!

Promontory Point! Promontory Point!
With the Golden Spi-i-ike!
Promontory Point! Promontory Point!
with the Golden Spike!

Someone's in the picture of history, someone's in the picture I kno-o-ow.
Someone's in the picture of history, it's great grandpa Grenville!
He's singing "fee-fi-fiddly-high-oh, tickets-fees-I'm-in-the-dough-oh! Fee-fi-fiddly-high-oh!" That's grandpa Grenville!

(*applause*)
Thank You.
We really did have a great time watching the re-enactment of the spike, better than we expected. And it was cool to learn that my great grandpa was part of the ceremony! He's the one circled in the photo. The national parks brochure says he was the Cheif Engineer for the Union Pacific. Sounds pretty important to me.

"Shaina, I think I hear the train coming!"

Yeah, it's a real steam locomotive and yeah, we really got to see it speeding down the tracks, and yeah, it was cool.

This time I mean it

I'VE HAD ENOUGH! I can't take even more one day of it. All the whining and complaining, the feeling sorry and making up excuses. It's the same thing every day and of course it never changes because NO ONE MAKES IT CHANGE!
Well, baby get ready, because it's changing RIGHT NOW!

That's right. I'm done walking past the glass doors at work and noticing what has gradually worked over me. I'm done starting a program and giving up 2 weeks later. I'm done "taking a water break" after only 10 minutes of playing any sport or outside game. And I am most certainly done squeezing into those capri pants from High School until I can BUTTON THEM UP and BREATHE at the same time!

I bought the MP3 player ($20 at Overstock.com) and loaded it up with songs.
I bought the Hello Kitty digital watch with timer ($6 Target).
I found the training program (Google "couch to 5k")
And I set the goal: The Deseret Morning News Days of '47 5K run on July 24th.

I will train and I will run this race.

ARE YOU WITH ME?

GOOOAAAL!

Our little family is big on themes. And the theme of this weekend has been a soccer one. It started with a friday evening picnic and pick-up soccer game we had with Mike's sister, her husband, and their little ones. It ended with us going to the Real Salt Lake game (our local major league soccer team, pronounced Ree-al)and Mike splurging on good tickets because they were playing LA Galaxy with David Beckham.

(side note: at first we were a little skeptical about all the hype around Beckham, but after clearing a goal from the middle of nowhere and then a picture perfect free-kick goal, we too are now believers. If even if he is an arrogant brit who takes his shirt off and walks late onto the field because he can and if he has a high-pitched femmy voice. He still is one of the best in the game.)

Both nights we had a great time. And I noticed a few similarities and differences between the games:
* Both nights there were moments of unsportsmanship. One night yellow cards were given out, the other just good old time-outs on the blanket.
* Friday night, Eli (my 4yr old nephew), got upset that his team wasn't winning so he threw a tantrum and pushed another player down. Saturday, Donovan from LA did the exact same thing.
* Both nights I found myself cheering just a little for the other team because of really good plays they made.
* The MLS didn't really have the challenge of one of their players being 7 months pregnant, or of a toddler who kept picking up the goal and walking away with it.
* The family league didn't have a problem with cocky players, stupid refs or annoying fans.
* Both nights I ending the evening looking forward to the time (hopefully soon) when we get to do that again.


Proof that we were there with Beckham and #10 from Real, one of Mike's favorites, taking a nice one in the face.
(second side note: the best way to get tickets to Real is through KFC for a discount price or through a Happenings coupon book for an even better discount. And call us if you're going so we can join you!)

Vacation Report

For our Spring Break Vacation my family went to Ocala Florida. We visited Papa and Grandma Eleanor Openhowski. They were really nice. Everything in their house is green or pink or has flowers on it. We spent one day at Silver Springs where we got to go on TWO boat rides and the boats have glass on the bottom so you can see the fishes and stuff. We saw tons of alligators! It was cool. I was a little scared of the alligators, but Mike wasn’t, he's brave. The next day we went to Universal Studios, just Mike and me. It was pretty cool we went on some good rides and ate funnel cake. I really liked the Men in Black one and Mike liked the Mummy one. It was a good day, but I heard Mike said it was “highway robbery” when he paid for the ticket to get in. After that we went to eat at The Hard Rock Cafe. It’s one of my favorite places and Mike even let us order a chocolate milkshake to share! The rest of the time that we were there was spent watching tv or reading books or playing dominoes and stuff. And lots of sleeping in. I liked that. The best part of our Spring Break vacation was when Papa kissed me on top of the head before we went to "Palooloo Land”(that means bedtime). He said I wasn’t really part of the family before that, but he thought I was nice enough that he’d let me into the gang. I like Florida and can’t wait until we get to go back!

Scheduled Outage

Have You Seen Me?

Michael Burgoyne was last reported seen on the campus of BYU last week moving from computer lab to computer lab as they were each being shut down for the night. His wife says she misses him and wants him to come home soon. She thought finals were tough when she was still a student, but now thinks this is much worse.

Baby Hogs

Both of my sisters-in-law are expecting babies this year. I also have cousins on both sides of my family that are pregnant. Of the 15 "friends" with blog links listed on this page, 8 of them have either had a baby in the past year, or will have one before the end of the year. And then I got an email from a old co-worker this morning announcing to our office that she's expecting her 2nd child.
Ok, so what, right? I mean it makes sense that most people around my age are in the child-bearing stage of their life. And I am happy for them and their little bundles.
But Mike and I were talking this morning about how we're living in the last days. Who knows how much longer this world is even going to exist.
What if they are sending down the last shift of the entire human population right now? What if they run out of babies to send down before we're ready to have one?

So to all my reproducing friends out there I say:
Dudes, save some for the rest of us, ok?